I feel it is my duty to share this valuable information with all of you, and I encourage all brides, brides-to-be one day, bridesmaids, mommas, sisters, and wedding industry friends to keep reading as I share the top 10 mistakes I see brides most often make on their wedding day mornings, and how you can avoid them.
Because of the nature of my job, I think I have a very unique perspective that some other wedding industry professionals may not have. Being a hair stylist and makeup artist, I am generally with the wedding party from about 8-2 (give or take) so I am present for a large part of the getting-ready portion of the wedding day. I truly believe how you spend this time will largely impact your attitude throughout the day, and how you look back and remember the most special day of your life.
When I show up ready to set up, the energy in the room is usually calm, yet excited. Everyone is having their coffee, and we have all the time in the world. Fast forward a few hours and you have yourself a real ‘1:25 Crazies’ type of situation. What are the ‘1:25 Crazies’ you ask? Well that is what happens when the bridal party needs to be ready at 1:30, and everyone loses their ever-loving minds. SHEER pandemonium people. No one can find their Spanx, and I have a line of people asking for last-minute touch ups, that don’t you worry, I already saw and was on my way to touch up. No one wants to be part of the ‘1:25 Crazies’, I assure you. Not you, and especially not your hair and makeup artist. So help me, help you. Together, we can make this better, I just know it.
The following list is by no means exhaustive, but a valiant start to the greater good of wedding day mornings all around, and much happier and relaxed brides.
Mistake #1: Not hiring a wedding planner.
This was an absolute MUST for me when planning my wedding. I promise you, you want a planner. If you don’t have one, I can assure you a real three-ring circus. Guess who everyone comes to ask questions to all morning if there is no ring leader? YOU. THE BRIDE. I don’t care if you have spent 6 months typing up a detailed itinerary. Everyone is still going to come ask you all the questions anyway. Vendors will call you. Your Aunt Sue will call you. Guests will even call you and ask you what time the wedding is. I am not even kidding you, I see it all the time. So do yourself a HUGE favor and hire someone to take care of all the details and logistics so you can enjoy your morning stress free. Here’s a perfect example of why I am so glad I had a planner. The Sheriff was called to my reception many times, because of noise complaints from the neighbors to our reception venue. I had no idea, ya wanna know why? Cause I had a planner fielding that!! I enjoyed my reception without ever even knowing that the Jessamine County Sheriff was trying to dull my sparkle. If a full wedding planner is not in your budget, look into 30-day-out, or day-of coordinators. You can cut the monogram napkins and cups that no one cares about, and do something truly of value instead.
Mistake #2: Inviting too many non-essential people to be part of your wedding day morning.
The more people in the room, the more chaos. I would suggest sticking to your bridal party, your momma, keep it close to the vest ya know. Anyone who gives you anxiety, or causes you stress, maybe find another task for. Having trouble with your MIL? Get her a gift card to a spa for the day so she feels pampered, and BONUS, she’s not there making you looney. Too many children around can also be exhausting. If you want to see your special kiddos, maybe have them come at the very end to get their flower girl high-buns on. I assure you, you don’t want all 5 of your flower girls bouncing around you while you are trying to relax and get your hair and makeup done. And I can say from experience, that your hair and makeup artist doesn’t want all of her bobby pins knocked over while she is trying to keep a tight schedule, just sayin’.
Mistake #3: Choosing a location that is too small/not well lit.
I live my Saturdays in hotel rooms. Ohhhh hotel rooms. I understand the allure, I do. Just make sure they are abundant in natural light, and are big enough to accommodate you, your bridal party, and your hair and makeup artist and all of her things. I can’t tell you the times I have had no work area, and limited light. I chose to get ready in my own home on my wedding day. I just wanted to be in my space and have all of my things. If you don’t have a home that is suitable, I recommend an Airbnb perhaps. I know in Lexington, there are lots of downtown Airbnb options that are spacious and much better lit than hotel rooms.
Mistake #4. Listening to loud, anxiety inducing music.
I know, you’re saying “But Allison, we are excited, and we are ready to party!”. I am not saying you can’t have fun and enjoy yourself, by all means go ahead! Now if you are listening to Broadway show tunes at an ear-piercing decibel, making it impossible for the bride to even talk to me about her hair or makeup, you need to calm that on down. Truly I tell you, this happens all the time. Often the bride is too polite to tell her bridesmaids to switch it to a more calming Pandora station. Bridesmaids, you can help by remembering that this is her special morning, she has a lot on her mind and should be able to hear her own thoughts. There is a LOT going on, and I promise you will be much calmer if you let the music set the scene. Some of my favorite Pandora stations for wedding day mornings are Acoustic Pop, Boyce Avenue (love them, they do a lot of acoustic covers), and if you are a country music fan, Today’s Country is upbeat but still not obnoxious. Or you could just put on Carrie Underwood greatest hits and make this gal REAL happy.
Mistake #5. Putting things off to the last-minute.
Listen. I need you to really hear me on this. PLEASE do not put off anything, thinking you will have time to do it the morning of your wedding. Because you will not, and you will be stressed.
This list includes, but is not limited to:
-writing your vows
-writing your letter to your husband
-hand stenciling your reception signage
-assigning table numbers
-polishing your nails
-discussing logistics like who is going to walk Granny down the aisle
-whitening your teeth
-plucking your eyebrows
-assembling your program fans
-tying ribbon on your place cards
Yes, all these things happen. Do you know time goes exponentially faster on your wedding day? It’s like science or something. Do not be that girl!! I want you to enjoy your wedding morning sitting on a fluffy pillow like Miss Muffet. So I suggest getting all of that done at least a week in advance.
Mistake #6: Reading important, gifted books or heartfelt letters the day of the wedding.
Alright this one is really for you bridesmaids and family members. I realize you may not even think about it, so hopefully this will shine some light. I often see bridesmaids give the bride a scrapbook of letters and pictures reflecting their friendship, which is so very sweet and thoughtful. It is a special time, and I know that means the world to every bride. Instead of giving it to her the morning of the wedding, and expecting her to spend time thoughtfully reading each letter, maybe give it to her the day before so she can read it over that night before she goes to bed, or early when she wakes up. When she is getting her hair and makeup done is probably not the best time. She will either rush through it, OR she will get so emotional that she will cry all of her makeup off. Neither is great, haha. Think about maybe giving those thoughtful, meaningful gifts to the bride during her bridal luncheon, or rehearsal dinner. Exception to this is the letter from your fiancé, of course you will read this on your wedding day!
Mistake # 7: Not having your bag packed/ Not having your details laid out
This may be the real catalyst for the ‘1:25 Crazies’. If you already have your bag or purse packed and ready to go with you with you for all of your wedding day adventures, your life will be so much easier when it is GO time. In my case it was a giant Louis Vuitton, I just needed all my things. I had touch-up makeup, hairspray and bobby pins, perfume, deodorant, my hair piece, anything I might, maybe need. I also had all of my details laid out for my photographer. That way I didn’t have to try to direct someone where all the things I wanted photographed were. Make sense?
Mistake #8: Drinking too much/Not drinking enough…
Ok this one made me laugh just writing it. Ladies, no one likes a drunk bride, and it is really hard to put makeup on a drunk bridesmaid. Trust. I love mimosas as much as the next gal, but it’s a long day, so pace yo’self. If a glass of champagne calms you down, by all means you ‘Pop Fizz Clink’ it up. Just remember, water is your friend, so drink plenty of it. It will probably be hot under that dress, and we don’t need you passing out do we?
Mistake #9: Not trusting your hair stylist and/or makeup artist.
This could be on hair and makeup styles, or this could be on hair and makeup timelines. You hired us for a reason, so trust our advice. I need a certain amount of time in order to do my job, and do it well. I like to make hair and makeup timelines for my brides, so that we have adequate time to make sure everyone is happy. It makes for a much smoother day I promise! If I could take all of my brides into a separate room to get ready I would in a heartbeat! I spent some time in my closet room (for lack of better term) by myself doing my hair, and it was a special time for me. Sometimes you just need a break from all of the excitement to reflect on what is about to take place that day. I wish more of my clients would let me do this! Calm vibes for everyone. I would always rather have more time, than not enough.
Mistake #10: Wearing robes or shirts with collars.
Hair stylist’s worst nightmare. I spend so much time touching up hair that has been rubbed all day by the collars of shirts or robes. I once saw the cutest off the shoulder rompers at a wedding, and thought “now THERE is a practical idea”. Genius. Not only are they cute, but functional. Just something to think about gals.
Basically what I am trying to say, is that a little bit of pre-planning, and thinking through things will really help your wedding morning be calm and smooth. Wedding days undoubtedly get crazy, and stressful, but the more you can do to pre-plan a calm morning, the better. I put a lot of time into planning how I wanted my morning to go, and I am so thankful I did. Bridesmaids and family, you can really help the bride out by not asking her questions about things, but consulting the schedule or the wedding planner (see #1 above!) with issues or concerns. Also, please do NOT alert her when something is wrong. She has enough on her plate, so try to solve the problem first yourself, only bringing it to her attention when necessary.
To find all details on my wedding, you can find those in this post on my wedding day! You can also watch our preparations video below! I loved my wedding day SO MUCH!