First of all, there was NO birthday post for me yesterday, and I know this because my bff’s Tugger and Lilly texted and told me so. That hooker who calls herself my mom freaking forgot my birthday. She says she didn’t, but I know she only remembered on her way home from work. She picked me up from daycare (nana and pop’s house) and had the nerve to stop at KROGER and buy me some new toys and bones. Don’t think I didn’t know she hid them in the grocery bags. I could smell the beggin strips as she walked up to the car. Sadie Belle aint no fool.
I am currently participating in a “pug crawl” trying to drown out my feelings of neglect.She forgets my birthday, but don’t you know she would never forget to snap a sassy pic of herself in her cute new jeggings.Psh. Momma please. And then she tries to tell me the reason she goes out on the weekends is because “momma’ s just trying to find you a daddy Sadie Belle!” yeah right. I’ve heard that before; quit pretending it is for me. You hardly introduce me half the time.
I want an all day trip to the park.
I want a trip to the beach. I want to be a unicorn for Halloween next year. None of this South of the Border Sadie crap…
I want a baby sister. See what you can do about that… And most importantly, to make up for your lack of adequate party planning skills this year, I want a margarita bash next year for the big number 5. You realize you have a YEAR to plan this, so NO excuses.